Dads Never Leave

Although my dad is gone, I know that he is always with me. No, not his ghost, but just the memories that I have of him. Those memories are not all good, but they are mine and no one can take them from me. I sometimes can smell him. I know that must seem a little weird, but its true. He had this scent, kinda like old spice and paint. He worked for Charlotte Paint Co. for many many years, and he loved his job. He was a lot of fun to be around (for the most part). He was a rough man though, he loved to fight. His nose had been broke 11 times. the last time he done it to himself (long story). He loved his liquor. He drank over a fifth of Lord Calvert EVERYDAY. But above all else he loved his kids. He had 5 including Brandy. She wasnt really his but he had leagal custody of her. She called him "daddy". Sometimes I was a little jealous of that. I was such a "daddy's girl".

I remember so well the day he died... I just woke and went to piddle, when the phone rang. My now ex-husband answered. It was for me, of coarse. It was my step mom. She said to me, crying hysterically, "Your daddy is gone!" and that did't register with me. I replied, in shock, "What do you mean, he's gone?" She said, "He's dead!" and I didnt know how to respond to that. I was overwhelmed with disbelief and sadness. I asked her what happened and she told me that she didnt know.

The rest of that day was ONE of the worst days of my life. It was December 20th. His present was wrapped under the tree. The next 2-3 days to follow were even harder. Just trying to accept the fact that this was it.

I cried less and less and I visited his grave less and less, but I thought of him every day of my life and I still do. And some of the memories are not so fun, but most of them are wonderful! And given the fact that I have the opportunity to think about him and remember every little thing about him, makes me realize that DADS NEVER LEAVE!
In Loving Memory of HAROLD DEAN SMITH 7/16/43 - 12/20/98
I Love You Daddy,
your baby girl .... Lisa